A love letter to Vienna

Vienna -

I wanted to tell you how much I loved you. Your transportation system is great, and your weather, though it rained a bit, was much better than the norm. I understood most things people were saying because they were speaking in German. I was even mistaken for a native speaker myself because of my apparent fluency.

In case I forget to mention it, I loved the Schönbrunn Palace. You may just think I am saying that and hyperbolizing an already hyperbolic praise note, but in truth, I loved it. After Versailles and the Prague Castle, I was a little hesitant. But then my sister made me watch Marie Antoinette the night before to try to prepare me for more palaces, and it worked. It wasn't off-puttingly gilded and large like Versailles. There was just enough gilding and the enormous size seemed pleasant instead of something that makes me want to start a revolution just looking at it. The grounds were also nice and not too large. The Privy Garden was nice and small, and the maze was awesome. The games in there for kids were just as much fun for me, though I may be almost 30 (though I usually only admit to 25 at most). So much fun. It was like that toy store in that ski town in the Alps that made me want to turn 7 all over again. It was just a perfect day at the Palace. We even bought tickets for the concert in the Orangerie, where Salieri and Mozart had their big face-off. The Classical and Operatic pieces were very nice and the lighting was nicely done. On the whole, the only downside was how crowded the Apple Strudel demonstration was and it was late. It was very entertaining once it started, but that wait was not fun in a crowded hall. The demonstration and strudel made up for it though.

I didn't love the Belvedere as much. We didn't visit the lower, just the upper for the art, and while it was a nice collection, it was a bit blah after the Kunsthistorisches Museum. The Klimt exhibition was quite nice and worth it, but the rest was unimpressive for the most part. The Modern Art was the best, especially the Van Gogh you had, but maybe it is my lack of affinity with the Baroque and Romantic Austrian painters that left me a bit underwhelmed. The Belvedere grounds were also nothing the scream about, though the Botanic Garden next door was enchanting.

But then we found the Hundertwasser Museum. Nice work on bringing that man into the world. He may be a little crazy and eccentric, but exceptionally interesting art and architecture. Everyone should learn about this guy. Frankly, I agree that all houses having flat floors is a bit arbitrary and inorganic. Why can't all buildings have floors more bumpy and in line with nature? The Man probably likes straight lines too. Anyway, I would definitely encourage studying Hundertwasser in all school cirriculums.

I would also encourage more theatre study in school as well for obvious reasons. I went to tour the Vienna Opera House and while I can allow for a certain amount of ignorance among tourists who are on this tour because they can't see the opera since it is their holiday, but some of the questions these people asked could have been easily answered by Wikipedia. Our poor Italian guide spoke some English, but it wasn't the best and she could not project, so she tried but sometimes these questions were ridiculous. She did a good job with the relevant questions and by the end I think everyone appreciated how much work went into every piece performed. Now, I may be harsh, but some of these people were quite nice. The family from New Orleans was nice, but they did just need a bit more general theatrical knowledge. I know you, Vienna, as a city can do nothing about any of this, so I will just be appreciative of the tour that lets people know just a taste of what knowledge they are being deprived of because they prefer tax refunds to education. Anyway, enough of my rant and on to more about you, Vienna.

I would like to complement you on the historical center. So often in the center of town, I feel crowded, but with so few vehicles allowed in and the main area for pedestrians, it was so open and friendly. The Hofburg, splendid as expected. Karlsplatz and Karlskirche were magnificent. Stephansdom was nice if under construction. I am an understanding person, so I do realize construction has to be done even if it seems like a lot is being done at the moment. But we went to a organ concert for free at Peterskirche and it was amazing. The atmosphere of the church and the wonderful sound of the organ was right on. Keep up the good work with those organists!

Now the Rathausplatz was not under construction but was completely obstructed by the Film Festival. I usually love film festivals, but after looking at the schedule, there seemed to be more concerts and musical events than films. That is not a film festival, which includes mainly films. I know you probably have little control over the artistic types who run the festival, but you may want to mention the extraordinary lack of films at their film festival. Just something to keep in mind. The Rathaus was obstructed with a screen which seemed to serve very little purpose and could probably have been re-set-up for the few films they were showing so in the meantime it did not continually obstruct views of the beautiful Rathaus.

Nice use of green space. There were so many parks I often felt like I wasn't in a city at all, which is the highest complement I can give. They were beautiful and never too crowded, except with pigeons, which I consider rats on wings. But unless you are going to shoot them all, there are few humane ways to get rid of them. I would suggest signs telling tourists not to feed the pigeons. I saw many of these people feeding the pigeons as if that was a good idea and encouraging their children the feed these pests. Now I am sure, Vienna, that you agree with me about the pesky, destructive nature of pigeons. Therefore, since parents are obviously enabling future generations to increase the possibility of being overrun by these vermin, signs would be appropriate to police these idiotic parents. London has signs everywhere, so don't feel like you would be the only city trying to halt the growing pigeon population.

Despite the construction, Kunsthistorisches Museum was beautiful and I was very pleased that your docents knew their jobs in stopping illiterate patrons from taking flash photography. Some city's docents get lazy at their jobs or even give up (Paris comes to mind), but yours were firm and did not let any one person get away with disobeying the rules. As a firm believer in obeying the rules, I find it horrifying that so many people believe that rules are only in force if someone is there to enforce them. This underlying lack of integrity for the much of the human race (including parents rearing children to disobey even their own rules if they are not present to enforce them) makes me quite sure that situations like the financial crisis of a few years ago will happen again and again. Lack of ethical integrity has become common and will eventually (I predict in a somewhat far-fetched fashion) lead to the disintegration of civilization as we know it. For what is society and civilization anyway but living by rules so that people can live harmoniously together without resorting to the rule of the strongest? These people may just be disobeying a small rule, but it is only one instance of a global epidemic. I am glad, Vienna, that your docents are not shirking their duties, but rigorously policing those who lack integrity, at least in the domains you control.

Lastly, I am going to again mention your public transportation and road signage. Having recently returned to Italy, where Google Maps cannot function, I greeted your road signage and city setup as a paradisiacal. Signs were there and mostly legible! Also, there was adequate parking. Italians seem to believe that double parking is normal and has no effect on blocking traffic at all. Your foresight and planning in the ways of traffic and parking, all assisted by an excellent public transportation system. Frankly, your well laid-out city is a work of organizational genius comparable with SimCity while many Italian cities are still made of legos. Now, I do admit some Italian cities have definitely started to work on city planning and Florence and Venice have adapted considerably because of high volumes of tourists, but they are nothing on the level you are at. London is comparable, but even Paris does not come close to your level.

Vienna, while this note is and shall remain hyperbolic, it attempts to express my true feelings about my visit to you. Do not discount these words, even if they are meant in some levity, but think of the underlying emotion that had to be present for me to write them at all.

I remain a sincere admirer,
Alexis